In an effort to not make you listen to me ramble about what soup I had for lunch..or whatever..I'm going to try to throw a little more deeper thought on here (I do have them every so often)(I just usually get a headache afterwards)...

I realized tonight I need to read more. Was convicted a bit. I like to read. It always sparks new thoughts and gets me excited..usually..about my life and helping others..

What I'm Reading Now...(all links are to half.com, the best place to buy a book/cd cheap)
Rumors of Another World by Philip Yancey
Radical Reformission by Marc Driscoll

Books I want to read...
Blue Like Jazz by Don Miller
Velvet Elvis by Rob Bell (Pastor of Mars Hill Church in Michigan)(Pastor of the NOOMA videos)
Almost ANY of the Relevant Books

Philip Yancey's book is really good. Great for anyone to read no matter what their spiritual background. I love it when people, churches, pastors don't make any assumptions at all about things..when they explain things in a way that doesn't assume that we are on the same page already...Yancey's premise is this...i don't care if you've been a Christian a long time..or you're just wondering about the world....let's look at the world and see if there is evidence of "another world", a spiritual world that might be out there. Growing up in not necessarily a Christian home..but one in which we were encouraged until we were teenagers to go to church..I have learned to assume things were true just b/c everyone in church believed it...the historicity of the Bible, eg...until college, when I started asking my Christian friends the questions that a Christian is already supposed to know or that perhaps is just more taboo to talk about. This is where Yancey is good. He's not afraid to talk about anything really. I haven't picked it up again since about a week ago, so I can't come up with much more at this point. But hopefully, this will keep me accountable!

Other goals I've set for myself that I could use some help on...
Taking Guitar Lessons
Going to the Gym 2-3x/week

Get on me! :)

It's cool to be a part of a church that is not about assumptions...that is not about looking at 'the world' and calling it 'them out there'...but is trying to live out their faith in a non-judgmental yet non-apologetic sort of way...

Ok, weird one..but interesting truth I learned from watching..gulp..'Starting Over'...yes, I'm out of the closet now...it's actually not a bad show. :) It is a little new-agey for my taste at times...a little too much focus on self overcoming problems rather than turning to an outside power source (why wouldn't you?)..but even God tells us to work on our growth with His help...so..they were saying how the things we do..even the negative ones..are for reasons that we think will help us. They were trying to help this woman who was dealing with panic attacks. She was desperately afraid to be in any confined space. "why are you afraid right now," they would ask her (as they shoved her in a closet). she would answer, "because I don't have any control." she was talking about how she would just shut down when her father was around. she wouldn't ever say anything. they asked her, "what did that get you? what benefit was it to you?" she said, "it was easier to deal with him if she was just quiet." then they asked, "do you think it harmed you?" she said yes, it had. just made me think...i was like that when i was a teenager. i mumbled from the age of 13-23. why? b/c i probably didn't have the best self-esteem..but also b/c it was easier. it seemed like it was to my advantage to be passive. but as i look back..in the long run...it wasn't better to be passive. i missed out on a lot of life b/c i was passive. what seems easy is not always what is best. was reading in john 11 today about Jesus going back to the town Lazarus was in. his disciples were telling him he's nuts. he can't go back there. they want to kill him there. he said, "we're going back." he was a stud. he wasn't afraid of any man. i don't know about you...but if i knew someone in scottsdale would kill me if he saw me..i wouldn't take the 101. maybe the 51. but not the 101. no way. Jesus, although aware that he could experience physical pain as any man, decided to head back into adversity. this seems to be a theme in my life the past two years or so. avoiding pain/discomfort/conflict/ isn't always best for me in the long run. if i just want to stay safe, i am not going to grow. i need to be willing to go the hard places..to do the hard things..that God wants me to do. then my faith will grow. and i will grow.

ok, i think that's enough. i must be tired. i'm not capitalizing any more. :)

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